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Initiated by Bassey Ikpi, Here is my attempt to write for 30 days straight. Wish me luck, I'll need it  Recently, my days have been frustrating... I have some sort of brain difference (either ADHD or something else) all my life. I have the attention span of a gnat in a wind storm, I'm hypersensitive and I rarely want to be near people. But in my defense, have you met people? That last one is completely justified... I am "a woman of a certain age" now. I had hoped that I was able to navigate (by that, I mean, Hustle) through alright. However, my old tricks aren't working as they used to and I am finding it harder to get through my day without feeling frustrated or defeated in some way. It makes me literally tired but because of the insomnia, I rarely rest. Many of you know that I have a child on the Autism Spectrum. The way I do things (or barely do things) is affecting him so I know that I really need assistance or I will fail him (Side Note: Funny how having kids will make you take care of your self WAY better than you would have when you had no one to care for). I have gone for the assessment and I will find out (hopefully) and assessment or diagnosis. I have not gotten any type of formal diagnosis previously because of my own stubbornness and pride. After a certain age, you figure you have it all worked out. but of course, I don't. My work and home life struggles and my personal life is ridiculously complicated in that the way I select folks to be around is sort of like a random science that only I can understand. I have been the source of frustration among my peers and mostly my family all of my life. I am realizing that my running around is only hindering me getting anything done (or at east, feeling accomplished). Its representative of Women generally and Black women specifically (because, I'm all Black and stuff). We work so hard for others, we fail to take care of ourselves. In the Black Community (either by choice or circumstance), the Black woman is depended on for so much the stats about Black women and Stress are not surprising. I am realizing that I have to get it together before I drive myself and the folks I love around me into the ground. M
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Initiated by Bassey Ikpi, Here is my attempt to write for 30 days straight. Wish me luck, I'll need it  Today was a ridiculously horrible day. You know, one of those days that help define why folks hate Monday. The day where all of my ADHD Traits kicked in and left me completely wondering if all the things that my family said about me were in anyway accurate. Then you go to the Social Networks and folks are just arguing and insulting each other in the name of "Political Discourse." All insults, no compromise, All Talking Points, no manners. Then there he was on my twitter feed: @chrisman1991 He in no way agreed with me. but he had references to his arguments (Which I didn't agree with) and he was cordial and didn't talk to me like a child just because of my views. He disagreed respectfully and added information and so did I. No random people showed up to provide unsolicited points that wouldn't have been helpful. We were talking Citizenship and our stances on the random wars. and we still could leave smiling. Nice, Right? Now I can't even call myself 1/2 the liberal or salamander that James Carville is (I'm not even a registered Democrat). But I think I found a new Mary Matalin in Mr. ChrisMan, who's profile says he is a "professional Stair Faller" (which kinda makes him distinctively awesome). Thank you, Sir for restoring my faith in communication in a generation of electronic courage. Hopefully we can have many more productive discussions! |
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